Asking for a girl’s phone number, is a crucial moment in the process of pickup. It’s important because most of the women will refuse, even if you try or suggest, to have a same night sex with you. Even if all you want is sex, you’ll need to get her number and meet a gain. And if you want a date, then again – you need her number.

Therefore, exchanging phone number is a common way to make a pause in the initial interaction, and continue it on a conventional “date”.

For you as a man, it means that if you don’t get a girl’s phone number, you have very low chances to see her again. Learning how to get a girls number is one of the most important parts of an interaction.

So when should you ask for her phone number, what are the recommended ways to do so, and how do you make her want to give you her number?

Establish Attraction and Initial Rapport

A common mistake that men do, is to ask a girl for her phone number too early in the interaction. It happens because a man can be attracted to a woman within seconds (based on her physical looks) and therefore might believe that the woman feels the same.

But women have a different mechanism of attraction. A girl will need time before she feels attracted, mainly because women are attracted to men based on behavior – masculine behavior, and not so much based on physical looks.

Asking a girl for her phone number, should happen after you already feel that she is attracted to you and after you’ve established at least a basic level of rapport and trust.

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I know that some of your friends might suggest it, but using the opener “Hi, you are cute, can you give me your number?” is rarely going to work, and only on very desperate/horny women.

Ask For Her Number After Qualifying Her

Attraction and basic rapport are crucial in order to make the girl want to give you her number. But there is another step, that I found out could make your chances of getting her phone number rise to almost 100%. It’s called Qualification.

The idea of qualification, is to show the girl why you like her or are interested in her, because of something she did or told you. This allows you to show the girl that you like her not only based on her looks, but also based on her personality.

It also shows that you don’t like every girl that you meet, and you have standards.

So how do you qualify a girl?

My favorite technique is to use questions that I ask, and is coming to check whether the girl meets my standards.

Here are some examples:

•  “How are you at cooking?”, She will probably answer that she is OK, or good. And then you can add “Because I love when a girl makes me this special breakfast that I like…” (here you tell her about the breakfast). The idea is to make her qualify, and show you what a great cook she is. If you created attraction, she will want to show you how good she is.
• “Are you good at telling stories… Because I love women who tell me interesting and funny stories”.
• “Do you understand in fashion?… It’s important to me that women in my life will know to help me shopping”

You get the point? Make the girl to give you reasons why you want her. Of course, after the girl makes efforts to qualify, you should give her a compliment and a signal of interest, right?

Do you see the difference that you get by qualifying her?

Now, you are not just asking for her number because of her great body that you want to fuck (although it might be true), but also because of her great personality or great qualities that you liked in her.

Create a “Reason” For Asking

This technique is not as important as the previous one, but yet it will also help you to get her phone number.

You see, women today have a “thing” about phone numbers. Some women might feel that by giving out their phone number to a guy, they are “losing a battle”. So a woman might be anxious about it, and resist giving you her phone number.

This is a resistance without real reasons. She is just used to say “no” to guys who ask for her number.

So what I suggest is not just to ask for her number. But instead, ask her to go out with you. A good way to ask her out would be something like: “By the way, do you have any plans for Monday night?”, if she says “no”, tell her that you want to go out with her and drink some beer (or wine). If she is busy on the date you choose, try another date instead.

After you agree on going out, and especially if it’s on a specific date, she will have to give you her number, and it becomes really easy.

What if She Refuses?

A girl might refuse to give you her phone number. There might be many reasons, but the common one is because you didn’t create enough attraction.

What you should do in such a case is to continue the conversation, make her laugh and interested in you more.

Then, try again to ask her out. Remember, if it’s a girl that you’ve just met, you have nothing to lose for asking her out again. So give it another try.

But if she refuses again, it’s OK. You tried, she refused. Next time will probably be more successful.