Is this Delivery Man Looking to Drop Off a Package?
Maria has a delivery guy who she believes is interested. In her, I’m saying. Not just “generally interested in things.” Why would she write to me about that? Come on, people.
Anyway, she just wants the news — good, bad or indifferent. Is he, or isn’t he? And how can I tell?
Let’s take a look at the details, shall we? Sure, says I.
Hi Jeff, A devoted lurker and reader am I but you said keep it short so i won’t gush.
Hm. Hoisted on my own petard, there. When I wanted these things to be short, I didn’t realize that would cut down on the compliments, too. Eh, easy come, easy go.
Here is my question. A delivery guy has been coming into my place of work for the past year or so and always gave me lots of eye contact and smiles and now some conversation.
Ahh, the life of an itinerant deliverer. Uniform, spending time in the fresh air, and flirting with the ladies…
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Nothing personal but not just short and “have a good day” type of stuff, always stops and asks how was your weekend. I do like him and asked him if he wanted to go out sometime back in March but he answered that he in the middle of a break up right now but maybe later..not sure what that means exactly or what to do but we still have very nice and comfortable flirtatious exchanges , clearly some chemistry there. Here are the facts. He is living with someone. He has a child from a previous union. He flirts with me and initiates contact. Please Jeff, tell me is he interested, a little interested, not at all or somewhere in between all of those things..Thank you, a million times, please please answer.
Dear Maria,
Yeah, you just learned one of the really clear manslations first hand, didn’t you?
When a guys says he’s “In the middle of a breakup,” he means…
Wait for it…
- I kinda sorta have a girlfriend. But only kinda sorta.
- I don’t want to say just, “No, I’m seeing someone,” so clearly I’m hoping to keep your interest
Short version: no commitment either way. Keeping the options open.
My take on this is that he’s flirting with you because it’s fun to flirt with you. NOT because he’s gunning to date you.
The truth is, he might not even be gunning to sleep with you.
HOLD ON, MAC. MANSLATA-WHA?
Yeah, I know. Mind-blowing, right? Well, get ready for one of the great truths of manslations:
There are two very different parts of the brain in charge of GETTING a phone number and DIALING a phone number.
As in, there’s a guy in our brain in charge of gauging, getting and keeping women interested in us. Which women? Well…which women have you got?
But even though it’s fun and flattering and exciting to flirt — and even more so to be flirted AT — that doesn’t have all that much to do with the OTHER guy in the brain, the one in charge of “doing something about it.”
VERDICT: CAUTIOUSLY PESSIMISTIC
You know, Maria, it’s possible he will one day drop to one knee and ask you to the Olive Garden for a ride on the unlimited breadstick express. Possible.
HOWEVER, right now, he’s giving little indication that he’s pining away for that day.
The day he comes in and asks YOU out is the day you’ll know. I mean, he clearly knows that you’re interested in HIM, so the only thing stopping him from asking you out is…he doesn’t want to do that.
Sorry about that, Maria. Honestly, I’d let it go. If he changes his tune, believe me, you’ll be the first to know.
What do you think, ladies? Is Maria the next stop on this guy’s route?